Adoption: journey and blessings

There is no doubt about it, adoption is a journey.  Adoption is a blessing.

In the adoption world, we also talk about adoption being hard.  And it is.  But to define "hard" is difficult.

Hard is...

• Your child having a major temper tantrum and not being able to connect with her.
• Your child shutting down emotionally and not being able to figure out what has triggered it.
• Trying to decipher if an undesirable behavior or reaction is related to adoption or just a normal kid thing.

But hard is also...

• Listening to your child tell stories about her past.
• Reading your child's file and crying as you read what she has endured.
• Watching your child be fearful about upcoming changes (any change...change is difficult)
• Knowing that your child will continue to struggle with attachment, identity, and self worth.

Yesterday an adoptive mom shared that she was shopping with her two kids.  Her adopted teenaged son, who has been home over 10 years, waited outside one of the stores.  When my friend left the store, she thought her son saw her and followed.  But he didn't.  And when he realized that she was gone, he panicked.  He told her that she thought she left him.  Abandoned him.

The fear of abandonment lurks under the surface for our kids.  And that is hard.

But the blessings of adoption ease the pain of the hard parts.  Adoption is also an overwhelming blessing.  It is an opportunity to see God's redemptive work in a beautiful and unique way.

When Yuly had been home about a year, she asked me, "If you hadn't adopted me, how would I have heard about God's love for me?  In Colombia I only heard about God's punishments, not His love for me."

To be able to share God's love and the hope we have in Christ with my daughter, that is a blessing.

And from this weekend, as Todd was fixing breakfast for Yuly, she was sharing with him about her Bible reading for the day.  She is reading about the children of Israel and the tabernacle and was asking about the difference between the tabernacle and the temple.  This lead to a discussion of the Holy of Holies.  Todd reminded her about the thick curtain the surrounded the Holy of Holies.  Yuly interrupted and said, "that's the same curtain that was torn when Jesus died on the cross!"

Yes, my sweet girl has been adopted twice.  And to listen to her and her daddy have spiritual discussions over breakfast, to know that she is beginning to understand the love that God has for her, THAT is one of the best blessings of adoption.

The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”  Romans 8:15

Family Dedication

We are grateful for our amazing church, Celebration Baptist Church, for Yuly's Child Dedication service.

Like many churches, our church has Baby Dedication. Our three biological children had all participated in (slept through) their Baby Dedications. Our church has committed to make this service special and meaningful. One thing that I really appreciate about this service is that the dads write a blessing and speak it to their children.

As Yuly did not come to us as an infant, she did not have a Baby Dedication. But, I am so grateful to our church that we are able to dedicate Yuly now. Honestly, I thought about it only recently, but we want all of our children dedicated to the Lord. Yuly shouldn't have had to miss that dedication just because she was not a baby when she became my daughter!

So...on Sunday, March 3, our family stood before the church to acknowledge that Yuly belongs to the Lord and that we are blessed to parent her.

Here is the blessing:  

Yuly, because “God was kind and decided that Christ would choose us to be God’s own adopted children” [Eph 1:5], your mother and I pray “that light will flood your heart and that you will understand the hope that was given to you when God chose you. Then you will discover the glorious blessings that will be yours together with all of God’s people.” [Eph. 1:18] As a family, we vow to take God’s Word and “tell them to (our) children over and over again. Talk about them all the time, whether (we’re) at home or walking along the road or going to bed at night, or getting up in the morning.” [Deut. 6:7]. “so that Christ may dwell in your heart through faith. And … that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” [Eph. 3:17-19]
 

And after church, we had lunch at Grandparents' home to celebrate. Yuly got a new, really cool Bible (it looks like a comic book!) and some Colombian candy.

Looking forward to the opportunity to dedicate Hope before the Lord, too! I don't know if I have mentioned it, but I am really ready to bring her home!!