I was finally right!

So, because things have been so crazy, this post is a little late.  The date I was finally right about receiving our LOA was Tuesday, January 15.  I was minding my own business, homeschooling my girls, and Logan called to tell me that our Letter of Acceptance had arrived at her office.  Very Excited!!!

Now to tell you about the craziness.  First of all, I should admit that I have a disorder known as "Time Optimism Disorder."  I always think I can get about 10xs as many things accomplished as humanly possible.  (A friend of mine coined the phrase "time optimism disorder" and I always thought she should try to get this diagnosis included in the DSM because I am pretty sure I am not the only one like this).  Anyway, when I got Logan's call, I had the delusion that I would have all of the paperwork done BEFORE the shipment came the next day and then be able to turn right around and overnight the package back on the same day.  Well, that didn't quite work out.  Between parental obligations :) and feeling absolutely horrible, I didn't get it done on Tuesday.  Or Wednesday.

Even though I was feeling quite sick, when the package came on Wednesday I was thrilled to see our long-awaited document.  One that originated in China.  Wow!

Thursday morning I got up really, really early hoping to get the paperwork done.  Nope.  Not done before I had to go into work for a couple of hours.  All day long I was weepy--crying at just about everything.  I was convinced that it was a medication side-effect, but I spoke to my sweet homeschool partner (who is also a pharmacist) and she told me that my crying was not a side-effect of the medication, but of something else: stress.

Todd came home at lunch and worked on the forms.  He had it almost completed before I came home from work.  I put the finishing touches on it and rushed it down to the overnight delivery place (that I will not mention for soon-to-be obvious reasons).  Todd was reluctant for me to overnight it because there was a snow storm coming through Birmingham (where the adoption agency is) and he was worried that it might get stuck on a truck somewhere, but I was determined to send our package on its way.  Tip from the Bible that I should have heeded:  Wives submit to your husbands as to the Lord (Ephesians 5:22)

I got to the store with 5 minutes to spare.  As I handed the man my document I said, "You will take care of these precious documents won't you?"  And he assured me that he would.  The delivery promise was for 10:30 on Friday.

Friday afternoon...no package at Lifeline.  I thought about the snow.  I thought about the fact that I forgot to put the package to the attention to someone in the China program.  I wondered where our package was.

Monday morning.  Todd asks for a trace of our package and we are assured that they will look diligently for the package.  They tell us it may take several days.  Monday afternoon...the package is found!!!  At the store where I dropped it off...

Tuesday morning.  The package finally makes it way to Birmingham.  Logan turns it right around and sends it on the USCIS for processing.  In the same day!  Yay!!

In the meantime, we have also applied for our visas :)  And I took the little girls on a trip to Knoxville to see my brother and his family.  I know we may not be able to travel for awhile when we get home, so we are trying to make the rounds.

And, as the diagnosis for my tears last week was stress, my sister-in-law showed me the perfect way to treat it.  She took us to a drive through safari.  The kids had buckets of food to feed to the animals and the animals (llamas, rhea, various cattle, goats...) stuck their heads in the van looking for food.  The kids were alternately rolling down the windows to feed them and then quickly rolling them up when the animal encounter gets too close.  Sometimes one child was trying to feed while another one was rolling up the window so food projectiles were careening off all surfaces in the van with some actually reaching the animals.  I cannot adequately describe it other than to tell you that it was totally hilarious and I recommend this treatment for anyone in the Knoxville area that needs a stress release.  Here are a few photos:

Oh, and the good news?  We got our overnight fee refunded.  Saved that money!!

We have complete confidence that God is in control of the timing of our travel.  We continue to pray for our daughter and our upcoming travel and we welcome any prayers offered in our behalf!  :)

LID!!

No, its not that....

it is Logged In Date.

And ours is November 13, 2012.

This means that our file has been officially received by China and is now the arduous process of translating and approving our dossier begins.  Our dossier has 10+ documents--with at least one of them (our home study) being quite lengthy.  We have invested a lot of time, effort, and finances in these documents, so it is a relief to know that they are finally being reviewed by China :)

So...the next thing that happens is...more waiting.  In about 3 months, we will receive our Letter of Acceptance and then things will really start moving.  So, we are enjoying the calm before the storm.

And we are celebrating that we are one step closer to our daughter.

A Sneak Peek

During the first months of our adoption process, Todd and I couldn't believe how quickly and easily things came together.  We contrasted this experience with our first experience.  We concluded that perhaps God allowed us to have an easier time initially to help us know that this was the right decision.  With Yuly, we knew from the beginning that we were headed on the path God had planned.  And we had LOTS of delays. This time we were much more tentative about whether or not this was the right plan for us at this time.  And we have had a smooth path.  Until now.  Finalizing our home study has been agonizingly slow.  In the scheme of time, it isn't that slow, but now that we have found our daughter, every day seems to matter.  And here she is...

We don't want there to be any delays.  And yet, we have had several weeks of waiting.  Ick.

Our local social worker has been such an encouragement.  Such a blessing.  When I shared my discouragement with her she said, " I keep before me the image of you all finally meeting her in China, and me greeting you upon your return!"

So, we wait and pray.  We dream and plan.  We talk about her daily.  And we hope.

How do you define "normal"?

Before I work on defining "normal" I would like to share some more exciting news!  We've already heard back from China and we have been approved to adopt our daughter!  In our petition, we stated,  " We eagerly await your permission to add GY, whom we already love, to our family."  And it is true, we already love her and can't wait to bring her home!

And now to the point of this entry...

As we travel this 2nd adoption journey, we are so blessed that we have family and friends that are incredibly supportive of us.  We really have no horror stories of inappropriate questions (nosy questions, maybe, but not inappropriate) or discouraging words.  We acknowledge that some people probably shake their heads and think we are crazy, but fortunately, they are least outwardly supportive.

However, this is not the case for all adoptive families, and my heart today is sad as I think about a friend of mine who, as her family prepares to adopt, has been chastised for not allowing her biological son to have a "normal life."

This comment makes me sad for two reasons.  My friend was hurt by this response and lack of support and I hurt with her.  It also makes me sad for the person who said it because I'm not sure she understood what she said.

What is normal?

In the US, normal is...

• In 2008, 40% of children were born to single women and 29% of all children were being raised in single parent homes.
• In the past 30 days, 27% of youth 12-20 have had an alcoholic drink
• The average American family is $73,000 in debt. 

I don't know about you, but I don't want any of that "normal" in my family.  What do I want?

I want my children to evaluate "normal" according to God's word.  Verses like:

•  No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good,
      and this is what he requires of you:
  to do what is right, to love mercy,
      and to walk humbly with your God.  Micah 6:8
• Defend the weak and the fatherless;
      uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed.  Psalm 82:3
• Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.  Romans 12:13

Don't get me wrong...our family falls short of  God's "normal" but if we are going to strive for "normal" we choose God's normal and not the world's.

I want my kids to think about "normal" in other parts of the world.

• more the 6 million children die from malnutrition every year.
• approximately two-fifths of the world's population do not have access to clean water...of these, 425 million of them are children.  500 children die every day due to health problems caused by contaminated water.
• nearly 115 million children are out of school. Globally, some 53 percent of the children out of primary school are girls, meaning that for every 100 boys out of school, 115 girls are in the same situation 
• there are an estimated 143 million and 210 million orphans worldwide.

And I want them to be people of prayer and action, helping to change that "normal" in the world.

Some fun news :)

Our adoption agency sent in our Letter of Intent today!  If you are familiar with adoption from China you know what that means:  we have formally requested to adopt a specific child.  We are so excited!!

As I have shared, this journey has been very different than our first.  To this point I have been rather matter-of-fact about this process (unlike the first time--I was nervous and excited and impatient).  Not unhappy or reluctant, but just methodical in working through the process.  But that has changed!  God has moved our hearts and shown us our new daughter and we are thrilled.

Another difference with this adoption is that we were exposed to a lot of children needing homes.  With Yuly, we received her as a referral and then affirmed that choice after prayer.  This time I spent time looking at children...it is overwhelming to see the need.  We prayed for wisdom and discernment.  When we first saw this photo, we both agreed that we should request additional information on the child.  We prayed for a few weeks, including times of fasting to determine God's will in this, and we sense that He has overwhelmingly affirmed our choice.

Unfortunately, I cannot yet share any specific information yet, but please rejoice with us and pray that the process continues to move smoothly (and quickly!).  This is another big difference with our first adoption--this time we know about our child long before we can actually meet her.

The question that most people want to know is what now? or how long?  Well...our home study is almost, but not quite, done.  When it is completed, we send a copy off to USCIS to get approval to bring an adopted child into the country.  USCIS will send us an appointment for being fingerprinted and we will get to take a 3 hour road trip to be fingerprinted in Jacksonville, FL.  Then, we will eventually get approval and it will be time to send our dossier to China.  This phase will take about three months.  Then we wait for China's approval and for them to send us a travel date...this phase will take about six months.  So, we are looking at about nine months.  It will be a long wait, although we will be able to send her packages and begin to communicate with her.

So...that's where we are.  Things are moving along and I can't wait to share more!

Starting the home study...

Tomorrow (Thurs) we officially start our home study process with a visit from our amazing social worker.  Although this is our first visit from her in our home, we have not been sitting idly by.  We have been fingerprinted (including, this time, our 18 year old daughter), had our physicals, had our local background checks, harassed friends and family for letters of recommendation, and filled out about a million different pieces of paper that include everything from a checklist of special needs we would consider, a financial statement, and personal questions like "what does security mean to you and how do you achieve it?"

We have also started fundraising:  a garage sale and a storefront at Just Love Coffee.

We are also currently looking for a nickname for our daughter.  We did that for Yuly so that in the wait we could talk about her and pray for her in a more personal way.  Right now, Yuly has dubbed her nickname to be "China girl."  We have a friend whose parents are Chinese immigrants and we are hoping that she will be able to help us come up with something a little more affectionate.  However, having said that, Yuly drew our first new family photo with the initials "Ch G" above the new sister.  And since we know the age we are requesting, she is drawn in the correct order in the line of sisters.  So sweet.

But of course, our life isn't all about this adoption.  We have four girls who keep us pretty busy.  In May we:

• celebrated Yuly's 10th birthday, Audrey's 18th birthday and my mom's birthday.  
• attended Audrey's ballet recital and Yuly and Savanna's Irish dance recitals.  
• Riza and Yuly sang in a musical production at church.  
• Riza graduated from Celebration Kinderschool
• Audrey graduated from Chiles High School. 
• Yuly and I completed our first year of homeschool and celebrated by going to a homeschool convention in Orlando 
• Mother's Day was celebrated properly.  

May is a very busy time around our home!!  In fact, we were talking about our new addition and decided that one characteristic we will require is for her to not have a May birthday!