Monday, May 21, 2012

Crazy Love or Just Plain Crazy?

Reading the book "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan challenged me to consider the amazing love God has demonstrated toward me.  The evidence of His love is everywhere.  It is overwhelming.  It is comforting.

It is also convicting.

If God loves me that much, what should my response be?  To love Him.  And God's love toward me was demonstrated through action.  He sent His only Son to die for my sins so that my relationship with Him could be restored.  My only conclusion is that my love for God should also be demonstrated through action.

Through prayer and wise counsel, Todd and I are leaping out in faith that the action that God wants from us at this time is for us to adopt another child.

Todd and I have talked about adoption and I think we always sensed we would adopt again...some day.

But not now.  It doesn't make sense.  It's crazy.

Probably my biggest struggle is this:  I love our family.  My girls get along...mostly.  We love to be together.  We are not perfect, but we love each other.  Our home is generally a happy place.

There are many, many, children who need to be in a home like ours.

But what if by bringing a teenager into our home, it is not a happy place anymore?  
We know from experience that there will be struggles with bonding, transitions, and grieving.  There will be heartache and stress.
There will be difficult times ahead.  Do we voluntarily take this on?

We have asked A LOT of people if we are crazy.  
All but one said, "No."  
One said, "Yes, but the good kind.  You have to be a little crazy to undertake this."

So, here we go.  
Trying our best, in some small way, to reflect God's crazy love that He poured out on us.
Desiring to please God more than maintain our comfort. 
Trusting that He will guide us through the joy and sorrow that this journey will bring.

Saturday, May 12, 2012

I'm starting this blog to describe our journey...the impetus for starting this blog is that we are starting a journey to bring home another daughter. However, this trip started over a year ago, and at that time, there was no notion that it included an excursion to another adoption. This past year has been a time for spiritual refreshment and renewal for Todd and me. It has been a time that we have sought to deepen our faith and fully commit to following God. I think of the Steven Curtis Chapman song "Dive."

I'm diving in, I'm going deep in over my head I want to be
Caught in the rush, lost in the flow, in over my head I want to go
The river's deep, the river's wide, the river is alive
So sink or swim, I'm diving in...

But we will never know the awesome power of the grace of God
Until we let ourselves get swept away in this holy flood
So if you'll take my hand
We'll close our eyes and count to three
And take the leap of faith, come on, let's go!

So, yes, Todd and I are taking a leap of faith and are working to bring home a daughter from China--specifically a teen-aged daughter from China.  We are completely overwhelmed, completely excited, and completely scared--all at the same time.  We've been edging to the end of the high diving board for awhile, but we have finally dived in!